52 Quotes of Mindy Kaling About Acting

” You should never have to say hello or goodbye. Even at work sometimes, and I know this is very unpopular, is that if I’m going to work every single day, I don’t think you should have to hug people hello every single day when you come to work. I saw you Monday! “
” In terms of my Indianness, I try not to rely on it nor deny it. When it comes up organically in my writing, we can address it. About five years ago, we wrote this episode of ‘The Office,’ called ‘Diwali,’ which seemed like an organic way of using it. “
” People take things at face value on social media. Earnestness is the assumption. “
” I think a lot of writers, male and female, write as if their parents were killed in a car accident when they were 2, and they have no one to hold accountable. And unfortunately, I don’t have that. I have parents who I care about what they think. “
” Anybody can have a birthday. It requires nothing. Murderers have birthdays. It’s the opposite of anything that I believe in. And I don’t like at work where you stop everything to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to someone. I feel like that’s for children. “
” People talk about mumblecore but I prefer bumblecore, hyper-realistic bee movies about how bees really are. “
” I love talking about clothes with women; it’s like a code because women dress for women. “
” I’ve always assumed that my parents and my in-laws would live with me when I get older and have children. I just assume it will happen and that it’s the right way to do things. It’s a deeply Indian custom – that you kind of inherit your parents and your spouse’s parents and you take care of them eventually. “
” I was obsessed with being popular in high school and never achieved it. There’s photos from our high school musicals, and I’m comically in the deep background, wearing a beggar’s costume. “
” I had these kind of unrealistic expectations that were fueled by romantic comedies, and it has both helped me and hurt me in many ways. It helped me because, in general, they’ve made me hopeful. I just figure things will eventually work out for me. But nobody is like any Tom Hanks character. Nobody is Hugh Grant. No one is Meg Ryan! “
” Personally, I, Mindy Kaling want to spend like 80 percent of my life hanging out with women. “
” I try not to put anything political on the forefront of what I’m trying to do creatively. At the same time, I do think it’s wonderful when I hear people say that it’s inspirational that I’m an Indian woman on camera. My life is very diverse, and my friends are a diverse group of people. “
” I’m not married, I frequently use my debit card to buy things that cost less than three dollars, and my bedroom is so untidy it looks like vandals ransacked the Anthropologie sale section. I’m kind of a mess. “
” There’s the psychotic ambitious side of myself that wants a fashion line and my own network and be like a combination of Oprah and Gwen Stefani. And have a perfume. Definitely a perfume. “
” I never want to be called the funniest Indian female comedian that exists. I feel like I can go head-to-head with the best white, male comedy writers that are out there. Why would I want to self-categorize myself into a smaller group than I’m able to compete in? “
” I love that ‘Much Ado About Nothing,’ passionate, smart fighting. I love fighting with guys, and that’s something that I don’t get to see: arguing at a high level with a member of the opposite sex. That didn’t really happen that much on ‘The Office.’ I just like that ‘Moonlighting,’ Benedick-Beatrice type of thing. “
” When I was a little kid, I wrote this play about all these characters living in a haunted house. There was a witch who lived there, and a mummy. When they were all hassling him, this guy who bought the house – I can’t believe I remember this – he said to them, ‘Who’s paying the mortgage on this haunted house?’ I thought that was really funny. “
” My relationship with my mom is really the single most profound relationship that I’ve ever had in my life. “
” I fall into that nebulous, quote-unquote, normal American woman size that legions of fashion stylists detest. For the record, I’m a size 8 – this week, anyway. Many stylists hate that size because I think to them, it shows that I lack the discipline to be an ascetic; or the confident, sassy abandon to be a total fatty hedonist. “
” My dad’s whole family is in Madras and I was born in America so we didn’t have that big Indian community. I don’t really have anything interesting to say about it. When I talk about it people are like, ‘meh, let’s talk about something else.’ “
” Live performance really terrifies me. I haven’t done it, really, in years. I think that’s why I retired from my brief career in stand-up. “
” It used to be that you had to make female TV characters perfect so no one would be offended by your ‘portrayal’ of women. Even when I started out on ‘The Office’ eight years ago, we could write our male characters funny and flawed, but not the women. And now, thankfully, it’s completely different. “
” If I could make a device where people could just intuit everything you are thinking – a little cable you plug into, like, a USB port, I would make a billion dollars. “
” Right now, I’m hankering for new adventures… Ninety percent of the time I’m having romantic-comedy fantasies in which I’m wearing little pencil skirts and hurrying down to the subway. “
” I’m someone who loves romance. I always have loved it. Most people who grew up as nerds, as I was, surprisingly, have loved romance. “
” I’m not good at anything except writing jokes. I wasn’t good at sports, I wasn’t good at anything artsy, ever. I think there was a real worry for a while about what I would be good at. I was just this chubby little Indian kid who looked like a nerd. “
” I feel lucky because I was a nerd, which I talk about in the book, but I had academic success, so through that, because that’s what my parents put a great deal of value on, I had a great childhood because I sort of fulfilled the expectations of being good at school. “
” I have such a rich fantasy life, I can’t help it. I do make up a lot of romantic stories in my head. “
” I think as humans, no one remembers their successes, everyone just remembers their failures. “
” I hated L.A. for a long time, and I wanted to leave it. I had these fantasies of going to ‘SNL’ and falling in love with some writer on ‘SNL,’ of getting married and living in New York. “
” I would love if gay men responded to me. All I want is for many gay men to dress up as me for Halloween. “
” As a kid it’s adorable to have a gap in your teeth. But then, because of the shifting in my mouth, I started whistling through it, and as a 32-year-old woman, whistling while you speak in sort of annoying. “
” There’s a female writer-performer thing going on in TV right now. “
” Growing up, I remember my parents feeling a little wary of ‘The Simpsons.’ This was the late eighties, and there was a wave of articles about TV shows that were bad for America. Then we all started watching it and loved it. “
” I feel like the high-concept shows that have some kind of gimmick tend not to be the hit classic shows of all time. “
” I am a super-confident writer, and as a joke writer and as an actress, I’m like, ‘I want to go head-to-head with every person.’ I am an Indian woman and I’m a kind of double minority in this world. “
” I feel like if I had my personality but was an OB/GYN, you would be psyched. You’d be like, ‘My chatty, pop-culture-interested but plainspoken, wants-to-talk-about-clothes but serious-minded doctor.’ I feel like I would clean up with patients. That’s kind of a cocky thing to say. “
” I have a great job writing for ‘The Office,’ but, really, all television writers do is dream of one day writing movies. I’ll put it this way: At the Oscars the most famous person in the room is, like, Angelina Jolie. At the Emmys the huge exciting celebrity is Bethenny Frankel. You get what I mean. “
” I am always surprised at what movie studios think people will want to see. I’m even more surprised at how often they are correct. “
” What I’d really like to write is a romantic comedy. This is my favorite kind of movie. I feel almost embarrassed revealing this, because the genre has been so degraded in the past twenty years that saying you like romantic comedies is essentially an admission of mild stupidity. “
” I regard romantic comedies as a subgenre of sci-fi, in which the world operates according to different rules than my regular human world. “
” I went to Dartmouth College so simply by being an Indian-American woman, I was already so statistically interesting. And then the fact that I didn’t want to do anything science-related, and I wanted to write comedy plays and act little bit – I mean, I became deeply interesting in college because of how rare that was. “
” I have a thick skin, which comes from being a not-really-skinny, dark-skinned Indian woman. I haven’t fit in every place, and so I’m kind of used to resistance. “
” Woody Allen is really the ultimate. I love that he believed in himself enough to do what he did. And I have that same feeling – that there’s nobody that looks like me in movies, nobody would cast me as a romantic lead, but I want to do it and I feel confident that I can. “
” People don’t want to listen to a celebrity tweeting about their charities and shows. That’s why comedy writers do well – we put out little funny ideas. “
” Fast food is hugely important in the life of a comedy writer. All we do is order in, and what we’re going to eat is hotly debated. “
” Twitter is so short, it’s safe. I don’t want my bosses to be like, ‘Hey, your script is due and we saw you wrote four blog pages.’ “
” Sometimes I eavesdrop on people. I could rationalize it – oh, this is good anthropological research for characters I’m writing – but it’s basically just nosiness. It also helps me gauge where I’m at: Am I normal? “
” When men hear women want a commitment, they think it means commitment to a romantic relationship, but that’s not it. It’s a commitment to not floating around anymore. I want a guy who is entrenched in his own life. Entrenched is awesome. “
” I want a schedule-keeping, waking-up-early, wallet-carrying, picture-hanging man. I don’t care if he takes prescription drugs for cholesterol or hair loss. “
” I really love ‘Bridget Jones’s Diary’ – and I love the book, too. You wonder how it ever got made into a movie. She’s supposed to be chubby, and two of the hottest guys ever are straight-up fighting over her? “
” Comedy writers have the most fragile egos. “